Wednesday, November 19, 2008

11:03 AM
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Pre-Marital Sex: Nick and Mariah Waited, Would You?

Mariahnickelleshoot To go along with the recent abstinence craze (shout out to Miley Cyrus and The Jonas Brothers), London’s Daily Mirror reported earlier this month that newlyweds Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon waited until they were married to have sex. Mariah told the newspaper that she and Nick “share similar beliefs” so this was the natural choice.

The couple didn’t have to wait too long - they wed after dating for only two months and they just celebrated their six-month anniversary. (For which Nick gifted his lady-love with diamonds -- no surprise there!)

But back to the issue of abstinence before marriage. First, do you believe Mariah, or do you think she’s full of it? Second, does such a pact have much "meaning" if you get married in less than two months? Just asking! I want to hear your thoughts ladies.

photo: Alexei Hay courtesy of Elle Magazine
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posted by:
Cassie Lo

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Comments (96)


Comments (96)|add a comment
1

I LOVE SEX

Posted by: SEX IS AWSOME
on February 14, 2010 at 9:02 PM

2

I think they are very smart and patient in waiting until after they got married to have sex. It shows that they are good in their religion (christianity).
They are both so loyal to each other.
And it's not about how long they dated its about how true and strong their love is.
I hope their relationship lasts.
I love NICK and MARIAH!
Bless them, such a cute couple.
I wish them both luck .
haha and i'm only 14 so yeah i think they should stuff the haters.

Posted by: Nick&Mariah
on January 30, 2010 at 7:01 PM

3

having sex is cool and fun

Posted by: joker
on January 13, 2010 at 9:01 PM

4

Try waiting 4 years before getting married. My husband and I waited that long before we had sex and neither one of us regretted it at all. I was a virgin, he wasn't but he respected my decision and even now comments about how that was one of the best decisions we could have made for our relationship. I honestly don't think 2 months is much of a commitment or wait beforehand, but hey it's their lives.

The reason why the divorce rate is so high because we view people as disposable, it has nothing to do with sexual compatibility. Marriage is seen as a "stage" in life instead of a LIFETIME commitment. Marriage has lost its sacredness because people in general, are lazy.

Posted by: Midwestgirl
on August 12, 2009 at 2:08 AM

5

My fiance and I didn't wait. We both feel that an antiquated belief in staying a virgin before marriage was no reason to withhold the feelings we obviously felt for each other. To be totally honest we had sex before we even knew that we were in love. We just as easily could have broken up, but we know that we love each other and we're sexually compatable. I'd rather know beforehand than get married and realize that I hate sex and intimacy with my husband.

Posted by: Danelle
on July 17, 2009 at 12:07 PM

6

I wouldnt go by Mariah or Nick because 2 months is nothing, I want to talk to someone that has dated a person for a year or more with no sex.

Posted by: Rosanne
on June 22, 2009 at 3:06 PM

7

My fiance is the only person I've been with and he's going to be the only person I'm with anyway. I always thought I'd wait until marriage but that didn't end up happening with him because we now live together. I feel bad about it because I'm Christian but we're getting married anyway so it's not the end of the world.

Posted by: bella
on June 16, 2009 at 4:06 PM

8

My fiance and I have been together for 2 years as of June 9th. We were just engaged in January and are waiting for our wedding night as well. Here's for all of those reading saying, "Sure! All of these women are lying", well, we live together too and have NEVER given into premarital sex. We are both Christians and we have seperate bedrooms. Only by God's grace and the gift of patience are we able to do this. From what most of my friends and even my sister have said when we first started dating, "You should test drive before you buy", I find that not only against our beliefs, but tacky. I understand that everyone is different, but so are we and people respect us more since they know this and now we're engaged. He and I have a spiritual bond with each other and to God that I've never shared with any other man. I know our wedding night will be magical.

Posted by: Future Mrs
on June 11, 2009 at 10:06 AM

9

Hi i am harry recheal from NIGERIA

i am really impressed waiting is the best
thing to do.because no hurt is attage and mutual respect exist.i and my new found love are waiting pls wait there is no regret in waiting only endless joy.

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Posted by: kneefesnogs
on April 7, 2009 at 3:04 PM

13

My fiance and I are waiting to have sex until we are married as well. It is one of the hardest and most aggravating challenges we have ever experienced; it has been said that my fiance and my chemistry and passion is extremely obvious and how amazing our sex must be. We have to reply that we are waiting to have sex, and the 100% most said reply is, "How are you doing that?!!! There is no way I could do that!" It is very difficult when you are ready to experience that with the person you love the most, but it is not impossible. Due to our religious beliefs and the way we were raised, it has always been engrained in our heads that it is important to wait. All I know is, I cannot WAIT for my wedding night! It's going to be incredible!

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on April 6, 2009 at 3:04 PM

14

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Posted by: stusesniche
on April 6, 2009 at 3:04 PM

15

My Fiance and I have been together in a serious relationship for almost 6 years. We're both 21, and have admitted to both wanting to have sex since we were 16! (We first met each other when we were 12) I'm proud to say we are both virgins, and we have no doubt in our mind that we will have amazing sex on our wedding night, and not a day before.
Am I saying its easy? HECK...NO. It gets hard, but we both have a relationship with God and close christian friends who all believe that marriages do better when sex does not enter the relationship until AFTER marriage.
We're waiting, and very proud of it. If you are truly in love with a person, and waiting is important to you, you will find the will and the way to do so. It's going to be sooo worth it and one HOT night! :)

Posted by: Dana Hall
on February 16, 2009 at 5:02 PM

16

My husband and I waited till we got married to have sex we were both virgins. He was 21 and I was 24. In a day and age were people have no self control and just feed their desires willingly and whenever they wanted it was a really challenge not to make love.

It was worth the wait our marriage going on 4 years is strong and I think that was one of the most important factors to attribute to it. He respected me and thought I was worth the wait and my desire for him grew till we got married. Then when we did get married man it was surreal and what a honeymoon was suppose to be hot and heavy and unforgettable not just a vacation to a foreign country.
Wait its 100% worth it no matter what people say!!!

Posted by: yvette
on February 13, 2009 at 3:02 PM

17

Hi!
I am writing from Chile, South America.
Waiting was something really popular here until 10 years ago. On these days is much more harder to find couples which would like to do this.

I think is really amazing to wait for the love of your life to know and experience sex just with him, so it would be something just the both of you share. I always had the dream that I would have sex for love and in my wedding night.

Well, I know it is difficult, my boyfriend and I have spent 5 years together. We both were virgins when we start dating (19 years old) and we are planing to marry in one more year (we are still students) so some things happened during this time... But we still did not make love! I think waiting is one of the best things you can do for a couple that really belives in love, as a way of giving their lives to each other, an for who belives that this promess is forever. This will give sex importance and sense of intimacy, unity and love you would only share in your world together.

Posted by: Antonia
on January 10, 2009 at 9:01 AM

18

My fiance and I have been together for 6 years now. I can't speak for everyone but I can share my experience. When we met we were both virgins. My reason for being a virgin is I wanted to wait for the right person. He grew up more religious and wanted to wait for marriage. We both agreed that we would take the next step until our relationship was stronger. As time passed we got to know each other better and decided that moving in would be helpful to our commitment as a couple. He never pressured me and I respected his views. One day we both just knew that we loved each other so much, had gone through so many ups and downs, and we were still there for each other. Nature took it's course and neither of us has regreted that wonderful experience we shared for the first time. Many will look upon us as sinners for not waiting till marriage and others might ask what took us so long. All I can say is God brought this amazing, generous, caring, and loving man into my life and I will never regret any moment we have shared together. We have been blessed and are getting married but for all the right reasons. Marriage is more than compatibilty in the bed or teachings we recieve in Sunday School. These things might help but won't make a marriage last. So wether you choose to wait or not make sure that your focus is on spending your life with a mate that will be there for you in the most difficult and challenging times. You will find many that will be there in goodtimes but too few that want to stick around for the bad days. Best wishes!

Posted by: eazo
on December 31, 2008 at 12:12 PM

19

Waiting til marriage is the safest bet there is and the Bible gives us some great reason why we should wait. I try my best as a "Christian" to imitate Christ. doing what the Bible says has been helpful and life-changing in other ways, so I would do the same for abstaining.

Posted by: Tiana
on December 26, 2008 at 9:12 PM

20

My fiance and I have been together for two years and waited about a year to have sex. I am also a Christian...and I've had kind of mixed emotions about it since then. While I LOVED having sex with him, I'm also proud of our decision to abstain during the engagement period. I absolutely admire anyone who waits. I can see both sides of the argument, and I think waiting adds an anticipation and a depth to the relationship that just jumping into bed doesn't.

Posted by: Brittany
on December 23, 2008 at 11:12 PM

21

I think it's silly to wait. If you love someone and you know you love them, then what's the problem? I'm having sex with my boyfriend, we've been together 3 years and since both of us have been married before (and one was a really really bad marriage) we see no point in moving to that step quickly, if ever.
We are committed to each other and in a monogomous relationship. Sex is enjoyable and very personal for both of us. We don't need a certificate or a priest to tell us that we're now committed for all time. We already know that, and that's what counts.

Posted by: Arya
on December 10, 2008 at 1:12 PM

22

Since my fiance and I are not religious in any way and living together, there is no reason to wait. I have my own beliefs about monogamy and not spreading stds, but we are the only people we are sleeping with and therefore it isn't a problem. I do respect those who wait for religious reasons... but I dont think it is common to wait. Just about every one I know is sleeping with their long-time significant other, so I find it hard to believe some of the people on here...

Posted by: Michelle
on December 10, 2008 at 12:12 PM

23

I agree with Samantha, my fiance and I won't know if we're good or not, because we have nothing to compare it to! That is my choice and I have no worries. No one is attacking you for your beliefs. My God doesn't want me to fail, but I know I can't succeed in such a difficult task of purity without Him.

Posted by: Joy
on December 2, 2008 at 3:12 PM

24

I understand that it is very important to some people that they not have sex until they're married, I see nothing wrong with that. I don't think people are thinking clearly if they think they should have sex before marriage to see if they are compatable. What a horrible way to choose your life partner. As for me, I am 22 years old, an ex-wife, a fiance, and a mother of 3, only the eldest is from my previous marriage, the other two with my fiance. I dont feel we have cursed our marriage or relationship what so ever. Neither of us were virgins when we met and it never bothered either of us. I dont feel guilty and have no regrets.

Posted by: Victoria
on December 2, 2008 at 3:12 PM

25

I have to disagree with the idea that 'you should have sex before marriage to see if you're compatible'. It's a shame if compatibility is determined by how good you are.
First of all, if you've never had sex before you don't know if your partner is 'good' or 'bad' in bed - because he's all you know. And that's a special thing. Sex is wholeness, it's oneness and to 'try it out' with other people to see how they fit is a shallow excuse for compatibility.

Does he hold you when you're doing the Ugly Cry, reminiscing over your childhood regrets?
Does he talk to you about his favourite childhood traditions?
Do you know each other inside and out relationally?

Humans were intended to live relationally. That means, in community, in relationship, with all people. Marriage is an expression of that and when youa re married, you're saying to the world "WE HAVE SEX AND WE'RE PROUD OF IT!". When you're not married, it's taboo, it's iffy, to let people know, and there's always the risk that your fling won't last. What is inherently relational about that? I think it's so great when you can be open and share with the world about who you are with.

I'm proud to say I'll be a married woman in 8 months yesterday and I'll be a virgin until 8 months yesterday.. night.

Posted by: Samantha
on December 2, 2008 at 10:12 AM

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